Losing a
friend would always be harder than losing a lover. Because, with lovers, there
is still the lingering uncertainty of how long the relationship would last. Or,
at least, you’re always afraid that you might lose the lover, and a part of you
might be silently preparing for the separation as best you can.
But with
friends, you assume they’d be there forever. If they’re real enough, when you
fight, you’d fight like family, and things would work themselves out
eventually. Friends are unfortunately taken for granted, but they’d always be
there for you – all the characteristics of family.
Lovers
might be friends too, but certainly they’re considered to have a more temporal
place in your life than friends.
When you lose
a lover, you will feel like someone has just violently raped you of your soul.
But when you lose your friend, it would feel like you’ve lost your family, your
silent supporters, your very own spirit.
You would
eventually totally cut off ties with a lover, but it is unfortunately not as
simple with your friends. Maybe because you can demonise your lovers easier
than you can your friends? Who knows. But you’d probably remember your friends
longer, and hold on to them tighter, at least the memories you have of them.
Their ghosts would haunt you longer.
But you
would eventually learn to let go, be they your friend, or your lover. And in
this day and age, it would probably be when you stop cyber stalking them -
cyber stalking your ex-lovers to see if they’re seeing someone new;
cyber-stalking your friends to see what they’ve been up to. Mostly, once you
stop cyber stalking them to see whether they’ve moved on. Because now, its your
turn to move on. It won’t be easy, but you will eventually do it, you will
eventually let go of them.
